Letting go and starting over
by guitarstrings0187
Summary: For Faberry Week Day 7: The Future. "Because in a twisted way, that accident still brought them together and helped reshape her future in ways that she couldn't have ever imagined. It brought Quinn's heart and love to her, and the life they had together so far was just the beginning of the future that they were building together."


**A/N: And here it is, the last prompt for the last Faberry Week. I still can't believe that it's over. It's so much fun seeing everyone's talents come out every Faberry Week, and it's really sad to let this go. Still, it doesn't mean that I'll stop writing Faberry. I love this ship too much to do that too soon. Until my very last breath, I ain't ever letting this ship go. Hopefully, the Faberry fandom will remain strong in our lives even though this bi-annual celebration has finally come to a close. I would just like to thank the organizers for the patience and effort thus far for creating something that the whole Faberry fandom has used as a way of sharing their talents. This is something that will forever remain in my heart.**

 **Without further ado, the last day.**

* * *

Rachel missed Quinn terribly. That was all she knew as she grabbed the Metro North Pass that sat on her desk and the key to Quinn's dorm room, haphazardly throwing them in her purse as she rushed out of her bedroom. A huge part of her felt empty for the past month for not being able to see Quinn in person, a gaping hole that only the blonde could fill.

She ignored the curious glances Santana and Kurt had thrown her way as she quickly pulled on her coat and left the loft, rushing out into the crisp New York air. The explanations could come later, but for now, she just _badly needed_ to see Quinn in person and hold her close and talk or do _anything_ at all.

Taking quick and long strides, she walked across the crowded streets and down the steps into the subway. She presented her pass and waited for the train that would take her to New Haven, and into Yale, where her best friend was.

Just thinking of Quinn made Rachel feel a pang in her heart. A deep sensation of _longing_ and something else whenever the blonde crossed her mind, which has been happening quite a lot ever since they graduated from high school.

There was no other way to place it. Her heart _yearned_ for Quinn, aching and longing for her physical presence, and the feeling just grew stronger with each day that passed by. Whenever she lay in bed at night, she wished that Quinn was right beside her, blonde hair splayed about on the pillow and her scent invading Rachel's senses. How softly and quietly, Quinn would ask her to cuddle with her, particularly after a stress-filled week.

And it made every part of Rachel ache. Strangely enough, it was only with _Quinn_ that she has ever felt that way. Every fiber of her being longed for Quinn and her warm hazel eyes and body close to hers.

She's always missed Quinn, and part of her felt that it won't ever stop. The yearning, the aching in her bones whenever they were separated once again by their busy lives. And she knew that she wouldn't ever want the feeling to stop.

The train came to a stop in front of her, and the thought that she was beginning to get closer to Quinn only made her miss her even more, if such a thing was possible.

Without much thought, she jumped into the train and sat down, her heart racing as vibrant hazel eyes and pink lips and pale skin plagued her mind. They always seemed to do that, catching her off guard each time.

Quinn's body molding against hers as they cuddled in bed, talking and laughing and drowning in each other's presence.

But each time they just _cuddled_ , Rachel found herself wanting something else. Wanting to slip her hands underneath Quinn's shirt and tracing the alabaster skin with her fingers. To feel Quinn's stomach quiver under her touch, right where some of her scars were.

And yet, she stopped herself each time. Because as much as she wanted to do those things, she was scared that Quinn might not want it. So she settles with simply just _holding_ Quinn, even though the act in itself was already deemed to be quite intimate for two people who were only best friends and not lovers.

The ride was a fairly quick one, and as soon as the train stopped in New Haven's station, Rachel got up and walked briskly towards the direction of Quinn's dorm. As soon as she arrived, she felt the ache slowly start to fade into a sense of peace and warmth.

She took the key that Quinn had given her from her purse and inserted it into the keyhole, then pushed the door open.

And there was Quinn, sitting down on the couch and rubbing her thighs – a sign that Rachel knew all too well. Guilt crept up in her chest as Quinn continued massaging her legs, and it's another of those feelings that she feels won't ever go away when it came to Quinn.

Even after all these months, she still felt responsible for the pain that Quinn was going through.

"Rachel?"

Quinn stared at her, eyes wide in shock as her hands stilled above her knees. She wore a pink t-shirt and a pair of gray sweatpants, blonde hair messy and curtaining her shoulders. It was beautiful, and Rachel can't help herself from staring at the angel right in front of her.

"I missed you," Rachel finally breathed out after a few beats of silence.

Quinn's expression softened, her hazel eyes filled with tenderness as she whispered, "I missed you, too."

Rachel felt the dull ache again, because God knows just how much she _missed_ Quinn. And she was there again, broken yet beautiful in Rachel's eyes. As if on autopilot, Rachel locked the door behind her and walked towards Quinn, dropping to her knees as she placed her hands on the blonde's legs.

"Does it hurt?" Rachel asked quietly, looking up into Quinn's eyes.

"A little," Quinn admitted.

Swallowing thickly, Rachel started rubbing Quinn's feet, noting how strong they were, even after the accident. She knew how Quinn wanted to be massaged, having done this after the blonde's recovery for days on end.

They just stared at each other, Quinn's eyes soft and warm and _home_ as Rachel carefully pressed her fingers against the firm muscles of Quinn's calves.

And she didn't mind doing this; visiting Quinn and running her hands over her legs whenever they ached.

Heaven knows she'd do absolutely _anything_ and _everything_ for Quinn.

* * *

Quinn's body was molded against hers, back pressed against her front, golden tresses tickling her nose and throat. Peering over Quinn's shoulder, Rachel saw the moon and the stars shining outside the blonde's dorm room, the night quiet. Except for Quinn's soft breathing, while they just cuddled together in silence.

Rachel sighed and buried her face in Quinn's hair, being the big spoon like she always was. She always thought that Quinn would want to be the big spoon when they cuddled in bed, not request to be held every time.

But Rachel enjoyed it. She simply loved having Quinn in her arms, like she'd always dreamed of happening. Contrary to what other people thought, Quinn was in all truth a vulnerable person. She may appear headstrong to others, but Rachel had always known that she was much more than that.

And they _fit_. They clicked and they kept each other in line.

Quinn kept her grounded, and if there's one thing that Rachel loved about her, it was that she wouldn't take her crap if she was completely out of line. Tirelessly, Quinn would gently remind her to be careful and tell her without hesitation that she was in the wrong.

And Rachel was grateful for that.

"I'm glad you're here," Quinn mumbled sleepily, and Rachel felt her heart twist and turn inside her chest. "I'm sorry for being such a mess."

Rachel said nothing and simply held Quinn tighter, wishing that she could have done something to have Beth over. It was Beth's birthday, and Rachel knew that the former cheerleader wanted nothing more than to spend time with her daughter on this day. The day that Quinn had given birth to a beautiful baby girl that had her eyes.

Quinn sniffled quietly, and Rachel felt a flash of pain surge through her chest. It was as though she could _feel_ Quinn's hurt, seeping into her and making every nerve, joint, and bone in her body ache. She absolutely _hated_ seeing and feeling Quinn _hurt_ and cry.

"I'm sorry," Quinn apologized again as she choked back a sob.

"Don't be… You miss her, and that's okay," Rachel whispered reassuringly, finally giving in to the temptation of slipping her hand underneath Quinn's shirt. Slowly and hesitantly, she ran her fingers across Quinn's stomach, quietly soothing the crying blonde in her arms.

Quinn didn't protest and merely let Rachel continue as sobs racked her slender frame, and Rachel wished, wished, and _wished_ that Quinn didn't have to go through this and _hurt_ most of the time.

But she knew that she'd walk the distance if it meant seeing Quinn in Yale and _try_ to take all the pain away.

* * *

The next time Rachel visited Quinn, it was a happy occasion. She'd finally mustered the courage to ask Quinn out on a _date_ \- which basically consisted of Santana yelling at her to get her ass over to Quinn's dorm to go fucking get her girl and Kurt pushing her out the door of the loft as a support to the Latina.

Truth be told, she was frightened at first. Mostly at the possibility that Quinn didn't even remotely _want_ her in that way. But she knew that she would forever regret it if she didn't even try, and with much encouragement (being yelling and eye-rolls) on Santana's part, she finally got the guts to ask the prettiest girl (but a lot more than that) she'd ever met out for dinner.

And now, they're walking across the park and admiring the bright lights that shone through the darkness. Her heart beat loudly against her chest, and she was pretty sure that Quinn could hear it threatening to jump out.

She'd never been this nervous before, and so far, only Quinn has rendered her speechless and trembling with nerves. Even though they've been best friends for quite some time now.

Then again, Quinn always had that effect on her.

Especially now that she's trying to pursue a romantic relationship with the pretty blonde cheerleader that she'd always admired and loved from afar since she realized that the feelings she'd been harboring was more than just a crush.

Without a shadow of a doubt, she knew that she was _in love_ with Quinn. Perfectly and wonderfully so.

Their hands brushed for a fleeting moment, and the contact made Rachel's skin tingle. Leaves and branches cracked underneath Rachel's heels, and again, the back of her hand made contact with Quinn's.

Until finally, she decided to slip her hand in the spaces between Quinn's fingers. She locked their fingers together, and she'd never felt more complete in her entire life than in this moment, Quinn's hand locked in hers. They fit perfectly, and Rachel wondered why it took so long for her to realize this. Quinn's hand was warm and gentle, and Rachel finally felt like she was truly _living_.

Quinn looked at her and smiled, her eyes shining like the stars above. Rachel had no doubt that those eyes were what would shine the brightest in her moments of need, brighter than all the millions of stars in the night sky combined along with the moon and the sun.

There was no denying it. She was absolutely and undeniably and happily _in love_ with Quinn Fabray, and she felt unstoppable with their fingers interwoven and filling the empty spaces in between.

As far as first dates went, Rachel felt that it was perfect. The silence of New Haven was exactly what she needed, knowing that Quinn herself was a relatively quiet person.

From this point on, she knew that she would go to New Haven more often to ask Quinn out on more dates.

* * *

Rachel took the time to admire Quinn. From her thick, black eyelashes that fluttered each time she blinked, to her darkened hazel eyes, the outline of her nose, the fullness of her lips, and her angled jawline. She was stunningly beautiful, even more so up close with her face glowing underneath the moonlight.

A sight Rachel was sure she wouldn't dare ever forget.

She wondered how she couldn't have seen this before. Quinn, lying underneath her and looking up at her with hooded eyes. She'd nearly thrown this away in exchange for a future that could have destroyed her life. But she still wished that the car crash didn't have to happen just so that she could open up her eyes to how drastically her life would change had she gone through with the wedding.

"Undress me, Rachel…" Quinn whispered, her eyes hooded and clouded with desire.

Throat dry, Rachel nodded and took off all of Quinn's clothes, silently admiring her alabaster skin that glowed underneath the moonlight. They kissed as Quinn slowly stripped Rachel, their bare skin flush as they tangled in the sheets.

"I want you, Quinn…" Rachel murmured, her voice low and throaty.

"I want you, too, Rachel… Take me," Quinn requested as she lead Rachel's hand to her warm core.

Rachel kissed Quinn as she slipped two fingers inside her tight heat, moaning at the warmth that enveloped her digits. Groaning softly, Quinn clenched her muscles and moaned Rachel's name over and over, her voice jumpstarting the brunette's heart. Rachel was glad that she chose to first make love to Quinn in New Haven, because she wanted everything to be quiet and peaceful when they had their first time with each other.

The slick sounds of Quinn's sex made Rachel moan and she thrust faster, their lips fused together in a passionate kiss. Quinn rocked her hips, mewls of delight falling from her lips as Rachel stroked her walls.

"So tight…" Rachel moaned, her chest rumbling as she curled her fingers inside Quinn's heat.

Quinn sighed and ground her hips, Rachel's palm mashing her clit with each rough thrust of her fingers. Rachel watched as Quinn's eyes fluttered shut, her moans getting louder and more desperate as she clung on to the brunette like a lifeline.

"Rachel!" Quinn gasped, her walls contracting as she came, soaking Rachel's fingers with her warm cum as her orgasm crashed against her.

It was a beautiful sight to see as Quinn fell apart around her fingers. Her hazel eyes sparked with ecstasy, the veins of her neck popping out as she let the waves of pleasure take over her body. Moaning quietly, Rachel withdrew her fingers and wiped them on the sheets, watching Quinn recover from her orgasm.

"Your turn," Quinn panted and rolled over on top of Rachel, her skin flush with heat as she stroked the brunette's slick folds.

Rachel could only moan and scream in pleasure as they made love throughout the night.

* * *

When Rachel woke up, all she saw was the blinding sunlight. She squinted her eyes and rolled over, only to be met with golden hair splayed about the pillows. The sheets were pooled below Quinn's waist, her breasts exposed to the warm morning air.

Rachel smiled and ran her hands across Quinn's back, relishing in the warmth and softness of her skin against her fingers. The previous night had been nothing short of amazing, and it wasn't just because of the sex. Quinn was her _girlfriend_ , and last night was just the start of the future that Rachel wanted.

A future with Quinn.

Beside her, Quinn murmured her name and snuggled closer to her, causing Rachel to smile widely. She kissed Quinn's shoulders and rubbed her stomach until she woke up, her hazel eyes still droopy with sleep.

"Good morning, Quinn," Rachel smiled and kissed Quinn softly on the lips. "I love you…"

Quinn smiled softly and buried her face against Rachel's neck, then tangled their legs together. Rachel hummed and ran her fingers through Quinn's hair, basking in their togetherness and the sensation of Quinn's skin rubbing against hers. She slid her hands towards Quinn's thighs and traced the raised tissues that littered them, and before she could open her mouth to apologize yet again, Quinn already had her lips pressed firmly against hers to stop her.

"Rachel, please stop doing this to yourself. Stop letting the past haunt you. It's not your fault," Quinn reminded her, hazel eyes stern and soft at the same time. "Don't- don't let it ruin your future…"

Rachel bit her lip and nodded, then slid her hands towards Quinn's waist. Quinn was right. She can't let the accident define her relationship with Quinn, the _future_ they had together. Quinn sighed and laced their fingers together, then stared right into Rachel's eyes.

"I love you too, Rachel," she whispered, and Rachel felt herself tear up because she never imagined that Quinn would fall in love with her too.

Because in a twisted way, that accident still brought them together and helped reshape her future in ways that she couldn't have ever imagined. It brought Quinn's heart and love to her, and the life they had together so far was just the beginning of the future that they were building together.

Quinn was right all those years ago.

 _You can't change your past, but you can let go and start your future_.

She can't stop the accident from happening, but she _can_ let go of it and stop it from getting in the way of her relationship with Quinn.

Because this was just the start of everything she had ever dreamed of, with Quinn by her side.


End file.
